Responsible Parenting

Parenting is the toughest job in the world. We ask ourselves each day if we are nurturing our kids the right way and worry ourselves silly about their future. I don't pretend that I'm a perfect parent, the fact is that I'm not. I make mistakes because I'm human after all but I try my best to instill values in my children and steer them in the right direction.

The moment I was entrusted with the responsibility to care for and nurture a child, my sole goal was to ensure her survival in this world when I am no longer around. I believe that at some time or another, our children need to be independent from us, as although we would all love to live forever, the fact remains that we will not. That's why I have a beef with some parents whom I feel is just plain irresponsible.

These are parents who love their children so much they fail to see that they are spoiling them. How, you ask? By blaming their mistakes on fate and others because their children could do no wrong. They may think that they are doing that out of extreme love for their children but the fact is, their children are unable to fend for themselves because they were never taught how to. How long do they suppose they can molly-coddle their children? We all have to go back to our Maker some time or another, so what happens to these children, or adults who are so used to having someone cover for their mistakes?

It's irresponsible parenting when the parents claim that they've done all they can while they are alive and can't care for what happens to the children after they are long gone. I could only think that they are selfish because after they are dead, the kids will be left to fend for themselves, something of which they were never taught in the first place. That's not being entirely fair to them. Strangely some folks seem to feel this way. Certainly, that's akin to throwing the kids into the far end of the pool, so to speak, without first teaching them how to swim. As parents, it is our responsibility to nurture our children and ensure that they are fully equipped to survive on their own.

I make no apologies for how I feel about such parents. It matters not to me either whether these are young inexperienced parents or old folks who should have known better. The fact remains that they had a hand in how their children turned out, and fate has got nothing to do with it.

Restoran Meaty House (USJ Taipan)

Every once in a while, I do love tucking into a good pork knuckle. When I do get the cravings for pork knuckle, I'll make a beeline for Restoran Meaty House at USJ Taipan.

The restaurant deco is simple but it is not the ambience that attracts me. It is the crispy pork knuckle, served with a side of coleslaw that I love. The pork knuckle comes in a huge serving so if you're not a big eater it is a good dish to share. The skin is perfectly crispy, combine that with the deliciously flavourful meat that falls off the bone and what you have is absolutely heavenly.

For those who are not keen on the pork knuckle, there is the grilled baby ribs. The ribs were slathered with a deliciously sweet sauce and grilled to perfection, resulting in baby ribs that were finger-licking good. The baby ribs are served with coleslaw and pickled pineapples with cucumber. Kids will enjoy the crispy sausage which is cocktail sausages fried till crispy and served on a bed of lettuce and carrots.
Meaty House also serves ham and bacon steaks which are very flavoursome. Restoran Meaty House's address is No. 37-G Jalan USJ10/1D, UEP Subang Jaya, 47620 Selangor, Malaysia. Tel : 03-5633 5634.

Wise advice for women

I received another email from a friend and have decided to share it here because it's so true. Read it and remember it ladies, because you have to respect yourselves before others can respect you. Nothing upsets me more than women who still choose to ignore the signs and yet make excuses for men's misbehaviour, hoping against hope that they will change. If women in some countries are fighting tooth and nail for their rights to make their choices, why do women like us, women who are privileged enough to be able to make our own choices, choose to throw that privilege away? More often than not, many women are afraid they'll end up alone, grow old alone. But is that any excuse to settle for just about any man who mistreats or disrespect you? Just so you have a companion? What use is a companion who strips you of your dignity? Keep your dignity ladies, teach your daughters. If a man can't accept you as his equal, then he doesn't deserve you.

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't 'be friends'. A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is
Don't stay because you think 'it will get better'
You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.


Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.
He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...
Even if he has more education or in a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending...
Compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships...
There is nothing cute about baggage...
Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...
A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...
Look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.

Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted

Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.*
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil

You should know that:
You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one.

They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices..
Make the right one.

Churros

I finally made my own churros and they are utterly delicious coated in cinnamon sugar. This being the first time I've made it, it doesn't look very pretty but then again, appearances can be deceiving. The kids and adults loved it and they were gone in no time. It's really easy to make and cheap too!

Post-natal depression

I'm due to deliver our 2nd baby anytime now. I'm excited at the prospect of meeting the little life that I've been carrying within me for the past 10 months. What I'm really afraid of is post-natal depression. I've had a mild case when I delivered our first child. For weeks after delivery, I would suddenly burst into tears for no apparent reason and felt like the whole world is crashing down around me. The uncontrollable sadness that enveloped me each day scares me to this day. It's the worst feeling in the world because I felt like I'm losing control of myself. For someone who prides myself for always being in control of situations, that is one scary feeling. I wonder if it will happen again this time? Perhaps the first time around I was overwhelmed with being a first-time mother. Perhaps it's trying to adhere to all those nitty-gritty traditions of keeping a certain type of diet, keeping warm etc. I've spoken to my family so that they can keep me in check, just in case. I'm not ashamed of admitting to post-natal depression, if we need help, then we need help. It's just a matter of awareness so that we keep ourselves and those around us, safe.

What a woman wants

I received the following email from a friend and I'd like to share it because I think that it's true for modern women.

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question......

'What kind of man are you looking for?'

She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking..

'Do you really want to know?'
Reluctantly, he said, 'Yes.'

She began to expound... As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man. I am in the position to ask, 'What can you bring to the table?'

The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, 'I am not referring to money. I need something more.' I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life.'
He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain.

She said, 'I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentallybecause I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man or one who is solely about sexual desires.' I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don't need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone whom I can respect. In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive....he just has to be worthy. God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself.

When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, 'You're asking a lot.'

She replied, 'I'm worth a lot.'

Abuse

It’s been barely a couple of weeks ago that Chris Brown made headlines by battering Rihanna and now comes news that they’ve apparently made up and even married.

This is actually devastating news, considering Rihanna is also a role-model for many young fans. I’d hate to think that young girls who look up to her will now think that it is acceptable to be battered and that things will get better and lovey-dovey after a few apologies.

A man should never be allowed to raise his hand on a woman, period. It does not matter if he thinks he is justified to hit her for whatever reason. It is simply not acceptable behaviour. Once the beating starts, it never really stops. It’s a vicious cycle. Many women believe that their man will not beat them anymore after making heartfelt apologies, but you’d only have to look at the Women Aid centres to see that this is not the case.

Girls and women need to be made aware of their rights to be treated with dignity and respect. It is indeed sad that some willingly allow themselves to be abused all in the name of love. Is it really worth it in the end?

Damn people!

This post is just a rant to let off steam and may I add, have no resemblance to anyone, living or dead. Any resemblance is purely coincidental.

Has anyone ever met the kind of people who thinks the whole world owes them a living? That nothing they ever do is wrong, but it is the rest of the world who is at fault instead?

How can anyone make their own decisions, then when it doesn't work out, try and pin the blame on fate and others? Oh, life is not what I expected, life is not treating me well enough. I hate my job. Oh, did I mention someone forgot to roll out the red carpet for me? I demand that life treat me better or else! It's just not my fault, it's someone else's.

When a relationship is not going well, what do they do? Stick with the wrong person until they find a new one. A wrong person is better than no person, no? And when that doesn't work, what do they do? Oh, why oh why am I in such a rotten life? A blind person can "see" where they went wrong, but no, they themselves don't see it. It's not their fault by the way, didn't you realize?

How about finally taking responsibility for their own actions? How about finally admitting that they are the ones responsible for their own predicament and not others? How about realizing that once you make a decision you have to stick with it and not expect others to dig you out of the hole? Because no matter how stinky the hole is, you went in there yourself so you better dig yourself out of it. Of course it doesn't help that there are actually people supporting such thinking so of course these people believe it is still not their fault. I think that's just letting them fall deeper into the abyss and not really throwing them a lifeline. But then again, I'm not sure if what they wanted is a lifeline. Perhaps all they wanted is help to push them into freefall into the abyss. Well if that is what they want, then I will play no part in it.

So there they go again, blaming others, dead or alive, for their own predicament. They want people to forgive and forget, and yet they themselves hold on tightly to their warped sense of what is right and wrong. Do they care about being fair to others? Have they actually given a thought to others instead of thinking about themselves? It's all about me, me and me. No, they only care about what makes THEM happy. But then again, everything they do is right. Silly me.

Isn't it about time for people such as these to look themselves in the mirror? As far as I am concerned, our problems are our own. If you have a problem, solve it. Stop that pity party, stop blaming others and start getting on with your life. Life is no bed of roses, and if it took them that long to finally realize that, what a pitiful life they must lead.